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Last Halloween

Happy Halloween y'all! Last year I was a bumblebee and Jon was a creepy, pedophile Mario. I say this because he was the butt of many jokes because his costume was a few sizes too small. And we hand out candy to children. It just wasn't right. And it's because we waited until the last minute before Halloween to stalk Walmarts shelves digging for anything they had left. It was that or nudity y'all. You choose. Actually don't! Because I will beat you down if you choose the later of the two.

Last year was my first year actually giving out candy. As a kid no one ever trick or treated at our house because it was way back in the sticks. Or maybe it was the "trespassers will be shot" sign? I don't know. Anyway, I was so stoked when we decorated our business last year and had hundreds of cute little kids trick or treating. I think I was a little too excited because I was handing out handfuls of candy to every child. And if a cute little lion roared for me or a little princess used her best manners, my heart melted and I poured their buckets full of extra candy. And then the kids see that I'm doing that so they start getting all greedy and asking for more and then I get mad because it's not cute anymore. It reminds me of that Friends episode where Rachel ran out of candy and the kids are too cute to turn down so she starts handing out money. And then the kids just start getting greedy.

Boy in the Cape: My friend told me you were giving out money.
Rachel Green: I was but now we got candy.
Boy in the Cape: I'd rather have the money.
Rachel Green: Well, that's not your choice. Happy Halloween.
Boy in the Cape: This isn't fair.
Rachel Green: Well, is it fair that all you had to do was put on a cape and I have to give you free stuff?
Boy in the Cape: Shut up.
Rachel Green: You shut up.
Boy in the Cape: You can't tell me to shut up.
Rachel Green: Uh, I think I just did. And uh oh, here it comes again. Shut up.

So this year I vow to tame it down and save some candy for all the sweet kids of the neighborhood. I'll share pictures tomorrow of our costumes. Jon's creepy again, go figure.
8 comments on "Last Halloween"
  1. that pic is hilarious! you/y'all are TOO CUTE!!!

  2. bahahaha I love that Friends episode but forgot about it til just now!

  3. Haha! I think that sign would def keep me from trick or treating there! Lol
    Oh and I love friends! And I can't wait to see your costumes!

  4. You two are adorable!! Happy Halloween!

  5. Love the friends reference; it's my fave!! I also have never been able to give out candy thanks to living in the boonedocks, pun intended, and can NOT wait until I have a house near civilization and hand out candy! Have fun tonight handing out to all the little princesses and superheroes!

  6. haha yes. i need to rewatch friends. rude, greedy kids!


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