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Uplifting Your Husband || Even When He Leaves His Dirty Clothes On The Floor

10.16.2014
Before I begin today's post I would like to apologize for my poor attendance or lack of attendance, rather. I am working on planning wayyyy ahead so that I'm not always last minute blog writing. Because let's be honest, when that happens I tend to just say, "eh, not tonight." And then there are tears that I didn't show up, right? Right...


I am truly blessed to be married to the man of my dreams. Jon is always by my side as my comforter, my challenger, my supporter. Spending some quiet, quality time with him on our baby moon this past weekend really reminded me how in love with him I am after three amazing years. We spend 24/7 in each others space, yet we can get away on a trip just the two of us and still act like newlyweds. It amazes me.

Unfortunately, even through we're so in love, I'm not always the ideal wife.

I have temper tantrums, I don't always speak in an uplifting manner and I have a natural tendency to put myself first. Isn't that awful? Unfortunately it's true.

I have to be really intentional everyday and sometimes remind myself throughout the day to step it up and be the Godly wife my husband deserves. It's a challenge, but I have some tips that have helped me for all you wives, wives to be and even girlfriends.

DON'T COMPARE HIM

You remember that time your best friends husband came home with flowers and surprised her with dinner? And you mentioned it to your husband and then punched him in the arm. That's a huge blow to his ego. You're basically saying that he isn't good enough. Ouch! I've done that plenty of times before and what made the biggest difference for me was putting my feet in his shoes. If Jon came home and said, "Gosh Bob's wife surprised him at work today with a homemade lunch and then gave him tickets to a football game" I would immediately feel defeated, like my husband wasn't satisfied. 

ENCOURAGE HIM

Every man needs to be encouraged. As the leader of your home he needs to be supported and reminded how appreciative you are of his efforts to provide for you and your family. It can be as simple as putting a note in his lunchbox telling him how grateful you are for him. Or write him a love note in lipstick on the bathroom mirror. Remember what momma always told us... It's the thought that counts.

PRAY FOR HIM

So many times when I see Jon having a hard day or struggling with something on his heart, I pray to God to shower him in grace. I hate to see him feeling weighted or burdened. The Lord is our shepherd, ask Him to protect and uplift your husband.

HUG HIM

Not just when he buys you flowers. Just hug him, when he would least expect it. And when he asks why, just tell him it's because you love him and you are grateful for him. Such simple words that carry such a huge meaning.

DON'T NAG HIM

This is big for me. I'm going to be totally honest and say my mother was a nagger (sorry mom, it's true) and I learned it from watching her in her marriage. I had a game changing moment in my marriage when Jon said to me, "You only point out the things I do wrong. It's like you don't notice when I do something right." Talk about a blow to the heart. I hadn't even realized how easy it was for me to tell him he forgot to load the dishwasher, but forget to say thank you when he folded all the clothes without me asking. Now I'm really intentional about praising his acts of kindness and keeping my mouth shut when I want to nag.

Remember, no husband (or wife) is perfect. We all have our faults and we all deserve grace.

How do you uplift your significant other?

That's Mrs. Burns To You
21 comments on "Uplifting Your Husband || Even When He Leaves His Dirty Clothes On The Floor"
  1. Unfortunately I'm a nagger, too. But admitting is the first step, right? Haha! PS - I love this picture of you two!

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  2. I can nag a lot sometimes too. This is a great reminder of better ways to focus our time!

    www.madeintheshadeblog.com

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  3. Thank you for this reminder my sweet friend. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed with blessings when I think about how lucky I am to be married to my hubby. Sometimes I am downright crazy, throw temper tantrums, stall on my house chores...and he still loves me all the same. graceongraceongrace

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  4. Seriously love this! I'm so guilty of the nagging thing and if that sentence ever came out of Nick's mouth (which I'm sure it's just a matter of time), I would feel terrible, too!! Such a great eye opener, thank you for writing this! :)

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  5. Great post, thanks for the reminder!

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  6. Love this post so much. It hurts so much to realize that you've been treating your husband badly and that he's noticed... even unintentionally. Thank goodness for forgiveness and do-overs.

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  7. Oh how I just love you. I completely relate, I love my mom & step dad but I definitely learned a lot of things I did NOT want to repeat. These are all things I've worked on and realized over the last 6 years of marriage for sure. You constantly learn and grow together, every single day. I know we're all guilty of comparing in the ways you mentioned, not realizing how hurtful it is, love the way you flipped the tables. Great way to think about it :)

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  8. It's nice to take a step back sometimes and try to see ourselves as others might see us - i.e. husband. It's so wonderful you've taken the time to come up with personal ways to help your husband. I love them all. Thank you for sharing!
    ~Bre

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  9. I know that i am guilty of a few of things, but I hope that can get better. I love this picture too.

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  10. These are awesome. I nag like crazy (but husband has a problem with putting his dirty clothes RIGHT NEXT TO the laundry basket...drives to up a wall), but I think the first step is admitting it :)

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  11. Thank you, thank you for this post!! I think this is something we all deal with on some level! I am a nagger and have to constantly have a "come to Jesus" meeting with myself over it because I know if the tables were turned I would not like it! Again, great post! just what I needed!

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  12. Great post! A lot of women like to say that they are married to/dating their best friend, yet they give their man treatment that they would never tolerate from a best friend (nagging, trash-talking, etc.). As I wrote on my blog recently, I think it is important to decide what is worth getting upset over. If my husband left the toilet seat up, I would rather spend one second putting it down than spend ten or twenty seconds nagging about it.

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  13. Amazing post, lady. I 100% agree. A friend of mine gave me the advice once that "he's not out to get you", he just makes mistakes or doesn't realize he's made you mad. Once I realized how unintentional things were, it changed my perspective.

    I try to lift my husband up as much as possible and take a few breaths when he annoys me so I don't flip out when I don't need to.

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  14. Love this - praying for your hubby is huge.... Think about it - who else is praying for him? His parents, my parents, maybe a few friends...?? That's not a ton of people!! I want to make sure that my husband is properly prayed for, and it is my job to do it!

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  15. Amazing post! I'm awful at only pointing out the bad and have really been trying to thank Cory for the small things he does. Plus, praying for your husband...so important! I love how Lisa said it above.

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  16. I love this post so much! I definitely agree... I am a nagger, and I hate it. Praying for your husband is definitely something I do without telling him. xo

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  17. Such a great reminder. I am a nagger too, and really hate it. And I also do the comparing thing. These are all things I need to work on, so thank you for the reminder!

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